The Black Lounge

What’s your opinion on this?

1. LOVE YOURSELF - Make yourself happy, don’t count on someone else to do it for you. Spend time alone with yourself, being introspective, meditating, truly getting to know the person you are.

2. KNOW THAT YOU MATTER - No one else matters but you. Stop comparing yourself to people!!! Spend time on the inner person, the person God wants you to see.

3. LEAVE THE PAST IN THE PAST - Holding on to past hurts only eats up energy better spent elsewhere. LET IT GO! Once you let go of the past, you can look toward the future, but if you’re steadily looking back, you don’t have time to look forward!

4. OWN YOUR FINANCIAL POWER- Too often we choose clothing, cars, food, and fun over real estate, stocks, annuities and other goods that, in the long run, tend to accrue value. Identify financial habits that are taking you down, see them as the enemy, and wipe them out.

5. HONOR YOUR ‘ME’ TIME - If you are too busy trying to make everyone else happy, you lose time for yourself. You need time to recoup and regroup, or you will end up depleted, dysfunctional, moody, unhappy, and hard to be around. Take some ‘me’ time, without any guilt.

6. PRIORITIZE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS- When the liabilities in any relationship outnumber the assets, that relationship is bankrupt. And all relationships have liabilities. To determine whether you and the other person can possibly work things out, ask yourself whether remaining connected spirituality, emotionally and financially to that person is more fruitful than disconnecting. Just because you need to excise someone from your life is not a strike against you or the other person, only a sign that the two of you are a bad mix.

7. FOCUS ON YOUR PURPOSE - All of us are affected by what other people think, say and do in response to who we are. Yet if pleasing other people becomes the goal, you will spend the rest of your life chasing down your critics. And if satisfying the critics becomes your goal, you’ll never have peace. Finding peace requires zeroing in on your singular, divinely ordained purpose, the task or tasks that God has assigned especially to you. Other people cannot define that. God has a role for you to play that may be quite distinct-no better or worse-from what’s designated for the next person.

8. REVEL IN YOUR SUCCESS - Surround yourself with those who won’t compete with you but will revel in your success and somehow see your ascent as a reflection of their own possibilities. And don’t forget that success is not just cash in the bank or degrees on the wall; it is living out your life’s purpose. It is being ALL you can be.

9. MAKE PEACE WITH YOUR FAMILY - Family drama is different than workplace drama: You can change jobs; you cannot fully detach from the people you are committed to loving. Manage family relationships in a way that gives you the greatest peace, which might demand putting up some boundaries -and examining the role you play in the buildup of that drama.

10. CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE- Jealousy is an outgrowth of not realizing who you are and what you possess. It’s born of fear that someone has a better life than yours, even though the people you envy are not without their own insecurities, pains, and unrequited dreams and hopes. Focus on your accomplishments, not your failures. Count your blessings. Celebrate the life you’ve been given.

I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.

How about never? Is never good for you?

I see you’ve set aside this special time to publicly humiliate yourself.

I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit.

I’m out of my mind at the moment, but feel free to leave a message.

I don’t work here - I’m a consultant.

It sounds like English, but I don’t understand a damn word you’re saying.

Ahhh. I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.

I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.

You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

I have plenty of talent and vision - I just don’t give a damn.

I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.

Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

What am I? Flypaper for freaks?

I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant.

It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of karma to burn off.

And your cry-baby whiny assed opinion would be?

Do I look like a effin people person to you?

This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting.

I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.

Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

Oh, I get it. Like humor. Only different.

A cubicle is just a padded cell without the door.

Can I trade this job for what’s behind door number 1?

Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

Nice perfume, but must you marinate in it?

Chaos, panic and disorder - my work here is finally done.

How do I set a laser printer to stun?

I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.

I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter.

Wait a minute, I’m just trying to imagine you with a personality.

Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?

Heard your wife left you,

How upset you must be.

But don’t fret about it…

She moved in with me!

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Looking back over the years

that we’ve been together,

I can’t help but wonder…

“What the hell was I thinking?”

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Congratulations on your wedding day!

Too bad no one likes your husband.

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How could two people as beautiful as you

Have such an ugly baby?

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I’ve always wanted to have

someone to hold,

someone to love.

After having met you ..

I’ve changed my mind.

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I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

I never believed in Hell until I met you.

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As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am…

That you’re not here to ruin it for me.

………………………………………..
Congratulations on your promotion.

Before you go…

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

You’ll probably need it again.

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Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky, West Virginia, and certain parts of rural Arkansas.)

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Happy birthday! You look great for your age.

Almost Lifelike!

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When we were together,

you always said you’d die for me.

Now that we’ve broken up,

I think it’s time you kept your promise.

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We have been friends for a very long time ..

let’s say we stop?

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I’m so miserable without you

it’s almost like you’re here.

=========================================
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.

Did you ever find out who the father was?

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Your friends and I wanted to do

something special for your birthday.

So we’re having you put to sleep.

))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
So your daughter’s a hooker,

and it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,

it’s really good pay!

Some questions that I have been asked this past week, or that I have internally asked myself…

Have You Ever:

Worried about your health to the point where you made yourself sick?

Given yourself to a person, only to find that they didn’t give a damn about you regardless of how you felt about them?

Had an image forced upon you, only to truly feel like you are nothing like that?

Been with a group of people on a regular basis that you feel don’t truly know you?

Felt as if you don’t fit in with your surroundings?

Done something so tedious for so long, that you wish you could just forget about it?

Thought about one million things a second?

Felt as if you think entirely too much?

Wonder what things would be like if you weren’t around?

Felt like just running away and never coming back?

Heard something that captured your attention to the point where you blocked everything else out?

Gotten butterflies in your stomach when that certain someone walks into your field of vision?

Realized that that was the only person that had that effect on you?

Tried to play off how you truly feel about them because you know that it would never work?

Played down your personality to keep the peace?

Held your tongue because of your surroundings?

Wondered why sometimes blood is no thicker than water?

Felt as if your hints to elude to things you are trying to tell people never are discovered?

just some questions….as you can see…I’m always thinking about something.

1. I have a biological sister I’ve never met before..she lives in Cali.

2. In ‘06, I was in 2 car accidents.

3. I’ve got the majority of my friends hooked on my mother’s cooking…lol ask them

4. Sarcasm is a trait that runs in my family.

5. When I was born, I was as light as an albino (no lie)

6. The first time I saw Friday…I didn’t get the point of it.

7. I hate Cheesecake…shit’s gross

8. But strangely enough, I love it when my grandmother cooks liver and onions…idk don’t ask me…

9. Niece E and I are more like brother and sister.

10. I’m a great uncle…no really…one of my nephews has a daughter. And yes, he is younger than I am.

11. I’ve been an uncle since I was 5 months old, and a great uncle since I was 19.

12. I have 5 biological siblings..ages 40, 38, 29, 28 & 16.

13. See what boredom compels me 2 do?

14. I have a scar on my wrist from when i fell off a rock when I was 12.

15. Traveling to Philly for cheese steaks is a hobby of mine.

16. My eldest sister is more like my second mother…she technically had a hand in raising me.

17. Even though me and her bicker constantly, I worry about her and her health…idk what I would do if something happened to her…

18. People constantly ask me if my 10 year old nephew is my son. (Yea genius….I was procreating when I was 10…)

19. I’m the youngest of all my cousins (on my mother’s side).

20. I used to wear glasses…in fact, at times I still need them.

21. I need braces. Even tho u probably can’t tell.

22. My middle name is My father’s last name (Damn D.C. rules!)

23. I actually like some country music.

24. I’ve been reading at a college level since I was 12.

25. I’m Lactose Intolerant (Shit makes me mad sick!)