Ok. So I’ve come to the point where I need to decide what I want to do about this whole Operation-Shrink-A-Gut thing. When I started doing this back in January, I was committed to making changes to my eating habits and to my overall health, and somewhere along the way, I’ve lost focus of that goal. Don’t get me wrong, the last time I went to the doctor (which I need to make an appointment for when I get back home, btw), he said everything (cholesterol, blood pressure, etc) was normal and that I was healthy. No complaints there. Although it was a partial reason to why I jumped on the O.S.A.G. bandwagon, it wasn’t the main reason.
My main reason for starting O.S.A.G. was because of the fact that I didn’t want to end up like my parents. My dad was about 6’5″ 400+ lbs. He smoked cigars regularly and ate whatever. When I was 12, he suffered a massive heart attack which lead to him having a quadriple bypass surgery. Although he ended up passing away from Malaria my senior year of HS, I couldn’t help but wonder if his weight played a role in his getting sick as fast as he did.
Now Ma Dukes is a totally different story. she smokes regularly, but she suffers from Lupus and Emphysema. I just found this out recently (within the past 5-6 months) from my sister, because she had no intention of telling me she had it. Being exposed to these situations, one would think that the apple doesn’t fall from the tree, right? I try my damnedest to make sure that that’s NOT the case.
At first, everything went well. I made sure I drank allot of water, I stayed away from eating too much and tried my best to eat the correct sized portions. But as time went on, I eased back into my old ways. I started eating all the wrong food and I started overeating again because of stress and boredom. I kept telling myself that I’d ‘start over again tomorrow’ but day after day, the same thing would go down.
A couple days ago, Monnie layed into my ass about what I was eating, and I can honestly say that it made me want to re-evaluate where I was going with this. Usually when it comes to things, I’m so used to flying under people’s radar, that I’d answer their questions with ‘it’s going fine…” or something similar, and I’d just go back to doing what I was doing before (and no one would ever ask about it again). Although I’ve been thinking about what she said since Saturday night, I wasn’t gonna blog about it. That is until I went to Lenox Square today…
I’ve made it a point to steer clear of malls because of two main reasons: I don’t need to be spending money there, and looking at all the clothes I’d like to buy but can’t because they don’t make them in my size is depressing. And of course, on my way to the Apple Store to cop a new charger for my laptop, I walked past all types of stores which happened to have stuff in the window that I actually liked.
At this point, I’m tired of half stepping when it comes to this O.S.A.G. thing. I want to go at it 110% but I don’t even know how I would go about doing so. Sure I eat healthy the majority of the time, but I’m starting to feel like it’s not enough. I guess I’ll figure it out one of these days.
Random Thought of the Moment: “Time to go to the grocery store again…”
The Song of the Moment: “Lucky to Be Me” by Amel Larrieux